When I was a teacher, June was full of promise. That first sweet month of summer provided time for reorganizing closets, training for summer races, reading books that I actually enjoy, and SLEEPING! As a mother, the month of June is similar in its promise: days are spent outdoors, meals are accompanied with little clean up thanks to the grill, and tired kiddos nap for HOURS after a day at the pool.
As a farm wife, however, June is a little less about promise and a little more about gritting my teeth. This June started out with a lot of good vibes. Crops were in (unlike last June), grain was being hauled, and roadsides were being mowed. All was good in Farm Country. It then began to rain.
We drove to town through flooded roads, and our gravel road turned to muck. All the farmers can talk about as of late, are the wet holes (which, of course, are all in plain view of the road), mud, the color of the corn coming up (did you know that the more lime-ish green the corn is, the worse it is?), and the weeds growing along side the otherwise healthy plants. The good news from all this rain is that our well will be set for the next 15 years.
Anyway, as June is coming to a close, I have spent some time reflecting upon my general mental state. It's not that great. I am nervous. I see the crops in the ground coming up, and, for the most part, they look okay (according to my untrained eye). However, there's still the threat of the weather: hail storms that could batter the growing plants, winds that could flatten an entire field, any time anything other than green shows up on the radar. . . the farmers are a mess.
But for me, the weather is not the only part that's making me nervous. There's a little whisper that maybe I'm just not cut out emotionally for this farm wife gig. You must have to be made out of emotional steel and live off the land to be a true farm wife. I, on the other hand, must be made out of goo and HAVE to go to Target once in awhile.
A farm wife also has to have this crazy amount of patience, and for me, that is one of the most difficult traits of a farm wife. It's hard to sit and wait, especially for me. I am not a patient person. I am a runner, not a walker. I'm a do-er, not a sitter. I even drive fast. So this sitting and waiting deal that happens, especially during June, is not for me. I'm filling my days with stuff to do and personal deadlines (such as, the trim in the upstairs bathroom that no one uses will be touched up by July) just to not go crazy with worry about our livelihood.
Regardless, my hope, as I look back on June, is that I'll learn that good things come to those who wait, and I'll continue to grit my teeth as the days pass. That, and the hope that no one will use the upstairs bathroom until the trim is touched up.